Thursday, March 1, 2007

Foreigners Steal Tarantino's Rodriguez While He Sleeps

Variety is reporting that in some countries, the Tarantino-Robert Rodriguez double feature "Grindhouse" is going to be broken up into two separate movies. Some might argue that this is a classic case of dirty ethnic types trying to swindle people into paying double for cheap crap like a twisted novelty Corona bottle or Last Supper relief made of glitter, but I applaud the move. You see, for me, seeing a Tarantino-Robert Rodriguez double bill is kind of like ordering a cheeseburger and having it come with a shit burrito – a diarrhito, if you will.*

If any of the countries splitting the bill could also figure out how to take all the Rodriguez-infected parts out of the Kill Bill movies, I might move there - watch out ladies! (and attractive ladyboys)

*This is a hypothetical situation not reflective of my actual dietary habits. In real life I am a vulturetarian; I only eat animals that eat other animals that eat other animals that eat plants. Top of the food chain, bitch!

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